Success…What does it mean?

pexels-photo-725743.jpegSuccess to me may differ from your definition. Your definition of the word might include things like wealthiness, accomplishment, or being famous. As a matter of fact, the definition is something like this: Success=an accomplishment of a goal or purpose. This is fine and good, but what I’m going to be talking about is the idea of success and not exactly the definition.

Success to me is a state of mind in which one is truly happy. It requires wisdom, maturity, and work for most people to be happy. That’s what it takes for me personally. Some may just naturally be happy, (my hat’s off to you if you’re one of those!) but that kind of person is a rare treasure. What I think it ultimately boils down to is making a conscious choice to be happy.

Now, let’s take a few seconds to think about being happy. What is it going to take, or what does it take for you to be happy? Is it lots of money, being free of debt, having toys? Is it helping others, donating, volunteering? Is it your dream job, owning your own company, inventing something? Maybe it’s being a published author. Maybe it’s coming home from a hard day’s work to your loving spouse and children. More than likely, it’s a combination of some of these thoughts. So, since we have determined what it will take to make you happy, let’s figure out what’s stopping you.

If you aren’t consciously and consistently moving yourself toward a goal that you’ve set, you aren’t getting any closer to being where you want to be. The most important and surefire thing that you can do to achieve happiness is to set goals for yourself. Step one of this process should be sitting down with a pen (maybe just a pencil/eraser combo depending on how indecisive you tend to be 😉  ) and paper. Step two is writing down your main (ultimate) goal. This is the big one. This is where you see yourself being happy in your day to day life. Keep in mind that there will always be small hurdles. Even when you’ve made it to you’re “happy place,” there will still be things that come up. They might try to knock you down, or make you take a step back. Just remember that you have made a positive choice to be happy. The next step is very important in making sure that you stay on the right track. This will make the journey a lot less mundane and tedious. Set small, realistic, and somewhat easily obtainable goals that you would like to reach as steps to take in achieving that final goal. Each time you check one of these smaller goals off of your list, reward yourself in some way!

All of this is going to take time. As they say, “Rome wasn’t built in a day.” It isn’t going to happen for you over night. No one is going to make it happen for you either. You are the ONLY one who can make you happy. As long as you stick to your plan, and keep reaching goals, you will get there! It requires the right mindset and definitely dedication, but if you believe in yourself, there’s nothing that you can’t do.

When you’ve reached your final goal, guess what! Time to set another one. I don’t believe in “happily ever after.” This means that you’re probably going to work at it for the rest of your life. Human nature is to want more and more. There is absolutely nothing wrong with that. The world is here for us to enjoy. Take it by storm! As you go, and as you get older, things will change. You will find new things that interest you. When you start achieving your goals, you will get on a roll and realize how capable you are. This might give you a hunger to “succeed.”

I hope that you’re as excited for yourself as I am for you! It would mean the world to me to have inspired a single soul to better his or her life. This is all you, by the way. Sure I wrote the info, but you took the chance. You kept reading. The ball is in your court. What are you going to do?

Marriage is something entirely different that I would like to touch on. I know that a lot of people are in stale relationships that are only being held together by children or just the sake of not being alone. This is not happiness. I am not telling you to leave your spouse. Actually, I want the opposite for you. At one point you were madly in love with this person, but things happened along the way. You fell into a routine, and you can’t stand it. You can’t get along any more, or you just flat out avoid interaction. Maybe you’ve just become roommates. This is where individual happiness, love, and respect play a huge part. Marriage is hard work. I’m serious. If you have been slacking and not giving 100 percent of yourself to your marriage, it’s time to reevaluate. Marriage is not 50/50. It is 100/100. If both parties are not working every day and choosing to love the other, it isn’t going to get better. You both have to sit down and talk. You have to decide whether or not you are both willing to do whatever it takes to be happy together. Is it worth saving? I say yes.

There are many things that will continue to help a relationship/marriage grow. 1) Continue to date your spouse. I’m sure there are plenty of things that you’ve never done together that you could try. Maybe just go out to dinner once a week or once every other week. 2) Read together! This one is big. It gives you a chance to talk about something that you’re both involved in. If you choose a book that will help your marriage, you are killing more than one bird! Don’t be ashamed to do whatever it takes to save your marriage. 3) Figure out how your spouse receives love. They may have a different love language than you, therefore they receive love in a different way. Usually the way we receive love is the only way we know how to give love, and that could be the wrong way to give love to your spouse. These are all just suggestions from a guy who has been through tough times. My wife and I have had to learn the hard way how to be happy together, but it’s getting better every day. Just stick to your guns, don’t give up, and wake up every day making the choice to love him or her.

Thanks so much for reading this post! Below is a link to a website containing information on the love languages. I am in no way affiliated with the following website. This is for your information only.

Thanks again! -E.G.

https://www.focusonthefamily.com/marriage/communication-and-conflict/learn-to-speak-your-spouses-love-language/understanding-the-five-love-languages

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No room for “hate”

What do we all have in common? I mean what is there across the entire world that we all have the same? Well, we’re all human. We all have a heart that keeps us alive, a mouth to smile with, lungs to laugh with. This is huge to me. We are all people who have feelings. Some people are more emotional than others, but at some point in all of our lives, we have felt something profound. So where does all the hatred in the world come from? What is the reason for it? What good is it?

Hate serves no purpose. The only thing that “hate” or dislike produces is pain, and the only kind of person that benefits from it is a terrible one. I wish I could say that I don’t believe in “bad people,” but I’m truly sorry to say that I do. Some just enjoy watching others suffer. There is almost no solution for that. All I can say is that we should train ourselves to be good judges of character, and steer clear of those. We can smile and nod as our eyes meet in passing. We can try to live by example, but choose not to be influenced by negativity if we were to try and fix them. Those people don’t want to be fixed. Not to get religious, but a higher power would need to intervene.

It’s important to understand that not all people who hate are full of that hatred because they are “bad” to the core. Some people weren’t raised in good circumstances, and they are products of their environments. Hatred, for most people, is taught and learned. Racism, jealousy, and greed. These things are destroying relationships, and ultimately causing the good in the world to decay. We have to fight it. I don’t mean a physical fight with weapons and battle cries…I just mean that we need to squash the hate. Get rid of the ill feelings. Influence others in the best possible ways. The more love we spread, the more likely it is to catch on. People need love much more than they need to be angry and hurt. Just strive to be your best YOU even when no one is watching.

We never know what someone else is going through. Most of the time, people don’t go around talking about their deep dark issues, but we all have problems. Try to give people the benefit of the doubt most of the time. It doesn’t help to get confrontational. Be the good example.

I’m not saying don’t stand up for what you believe in when it counts. I’m definitely not going to stand idle while a woman is being mistreated. I will fight back if someone attacks me or my family. Other than that, I just think to myself “maybe this person is dealing with a lot. I’ll just let them have this one.” Sometimes we have to let our pride go for the sake of doing good.

Give love a chance to grow. Make it a lifestyle choice. Make it a point to take the extra step to hold a door for someone. Help someone pick up what they dropped. Be good to everyone no matter their color, gender, sexual orientation, appearance. Remember that everyone has a heart. Try not to choose who to be good to based one their hearts, just be good to everyone. Stay set on your path. Keep making the right choices. Pass it down from generation to generation. Make the world a better place.

Thanks very much for reading. I hope it helps.

-Love, E.G.

Beat the morning blues.

Do you ever open your eyes in the morning and think to yourself some super negative remark?  Today is gonna suck….I have too much to do today….I don’t feel like getting up….

You’re not the only one. Trust me.

The thing is that when we do this, we are setting ourselves up for failure. Even if you happen to have somewhat of a decent day after having a thought like that, it’s because you’re just that kind of person. The kind of person who can bounce back.

Not everyone has the “bounce back” quality. My recommendation is to try and find ONE SINGLE thing to look forward to in the morning. Be excited to wake up the next day.  Whether it’s your favorite kind of cereal, or making time to do a little Yoga, maybe a run, or even just some meditation. We all need our escapes from the busy world at times. We have jobs, kids, spouses, school, cleaning, cooking…You name it. It’s easy to get wrapped up in what everyone else needs or wants and to forget about yourself.

I’m not saying to become a selfish person. Selfless is definitely the way to go, but you have to have time for yourself. You shouldn’t have to run and hide, either. If you feel like you can’t get a small amount of time away from your family, mention it to them in a calm way. Just make it known that you need a little time for yourself every day. It will make a world of difference in your day to day attitude.

Another idea to upgrade your quality of life is to find a hobby. I know that sounds kinda cliche, but this kind of thing can make a real difference. There’s something about learning something from scratch and watching your own progress that is very fulfilling. Maybe you were meant to be a musician, but you never got the chance to pick up an instrument. Maybe you’ve told yourself over and over that you aren’t good at anything, and it would be a waste of time to try and find a hobby. We are all good at something. It could be fun just trying different things until you finally find something that you like to do!

If you already have a hobby, maybe you’ve been neglecting it and feel guilty that you haven’t made time for it. Now’s the time. I can totally relate to this one. My wife and I just bought a house a few months ago and have been working on painting different rooms. My son is just now nine months old, and he is a hand full! You get the picture, I’m sure! Well, I used to play a lot of music, but not so much these days. I’ve just been wrapped up with work, painting, cutting grass, washing cars, cleaning house, spending time with my wife, and plenty of other things. So I’m preaching to myself as well here.

My point is that if we can find something to look forward to, it can give us a positive outlook on the day. Days seem much shorter as we get older, and we have to find a way to enjoy them. Cut out the negativity! Make the most out of every day, and try to make someone else’s! It’s the little things that make us truly happy. Having toys and lots of money…That isn’t real joy. Focus on your family, your friends, your SELF!

Thanks for reading, and I sincerely hope this helped.

Follow me on Twitter @eternal_grind for more uplifting content daily!  Thanks so much!

-E.G.

Life is a grind…A little motivation

As a kid, I remember being in certain situations or circumstances where I felt like I would never get past that moment. Like time was just standing still, and I was in some sort of living hell. I didn’t care that time would pass, and that eventually I would forget about the pain or discomfort I was experiencing. Reality can come down hard on us making us feel trapped by time itself. Just remember that the clock’s still clicking (or ticking if you like that better.)

The truth is that time really does heal all things. That moment will pass, and the memory will become more faint with every second that expires. What I’m trying to say is that if we find even one thing in this world that makes us happy enough to carry through, everything will be alright. There is always a reason to see tomorrow. Even if you are in the lowest slump of your life, and feel that you will never see light again, something will eventually pull you out. Things will get better.

Life is all about choices. The choices that you make put you where you are and where you will end up. I see so many people every day who are just settling for what they think is the best that they can do. It’s not. We have to set goals for ourselves. Have something to work toward, and to look forward to. There’s no sense in just living day to day without enjoying life. That’s why we have to grind. Grind it out. Make your own future. If you want to go back to school when you’re 50 years old…DO IT! Stop caring what other people think, and take control of your own life. If you’re young, and don’t quite know what you want to do with your life, just pick something! Get an education while you’re thinking about it. It won’t go to waste.

I feel like the younger generation is getting so lazy. No one wants to work hard for what they want any more. The world doesn’t owe us anything. No one owes us anything. Forget about racism, forget about the past. Just move forward with your life, and try your hardest to succeed. You will. I promise.